Currently I am knee deep in the summer break from university. I'm pretty sure that I'm meant to be planning dissertation ideas and a future and I'll be honest, the whole thing is freaking me out. It has suddenly hit me that in a years time I will be finishing university. My degree will be over. Three years ago, I'm pretty sure it felt like it would drag on forever. And just as suddenly, I am faced with the abyss. A sickenly large void that is otherwise known as the future.
It terrfies me. Life right now is full of endings, and of new beginnings. And lots and lots of change. I'm wondering about what the end of my degree even means. Am I meant to finally start getting my shit together? But then, what does that mean?
But finishing my degree is the end of such a big chapter and I am worried about leaving it behind. I'm going to miss seeing friends every day and even announcing my panic in the safety of the lecturer's office. All of it.
Am I meant to start looking for a graduate job? I don't even know if I'm ready to do my masters or why I'm thinking this far ahead? I'm worried about being out of education; will my brain turn to mush?
Am I the only one who is worried about all of this?
I don't know. I'm hoping that all of these recent changes will bring about happiness and peace (probably a very unrealistic and stupid thing to hope for but here we are).
I hope you all have wonderful and stress free weeks